Course 2:

Helping kids get along

Nothing destroys harmony at home more quickly than children starting to fight. So often we think it’s over something trivial. Why do they do it? and what can we do to help them get along?

This in-depth workshop teaches you when to stand back, when to intervene, and how to handle your own reactions. You will learn what causes children to react so strongly to each other and how to handle conflict and fights. Along the way, you’ll give them the skills that have the greatest impact on their happiness: getting on with different people, standing up for themselves, and understanding how to keep trying till conflict is resolved.

We’ll meet six times. At the end of the six weeks you’ll know how to:

  • Hear how kids feel about each other without feeling disloyal.

  • Teach children skills for expressing what they need without harming others.

  • Respond to conflicts effectively.

  • Learn when to intervene in fights and when to stay out.

  • Build an environment where kids want to cooperate because they feel appreciated, understood, and valued for who they are.

  • Change your attitude toward your most difficult child.

  • What happens to you and your children when they express their hostile feelings toward each other? How can you help without getting caught in the middle? We consider 4 methods for helping kids communicate without cutting each other down.

  • We look at how children feel when they are compared – and how to motivate children without using comparisons. We discuss the trap of trying to always treat kids ‘equally’ – and look at ways to be truly fair.

  • Why do children take on roles, and how do they put each other in them? How do roles perpetuate themselves, and what effect does being in a role have on a child? We evaluate several methods for helping kids realise their full capabilities.

  • What are the four levels of fighting between children? When is it necessary to intervene? We explore commonly used strategies that backfire and practice methods that help calm things down and enable children to work out their own solutions.

  • We practice a tried-and-tested method for helping children deal with the repeated, intensifying problems they can’t work out themselves. This approach allows us to move from anger to positive action in a safe environment.

  • We consider how our view of ourselves affects how we deal with our children – and how to change how we see ourselves and those around us.